This morning John's mom called and said that his grandma is dying - probably today. She has wasted away to 60 lbs. (that's less than Hailey) and can't move by herself anymore. It is Tyler's b-day, but I rescheduled everyone for Weds. when my husband will be here. Which worked out better for everyone anyway. I told John he should book a flight and get out there right away. He did and is there now. I feel frustrated and sad. Frustrated, cause I thought that her dr. had changed her meds and supposedly she was "eating everything in sight" according to one of her daughters. How could that be and now she is facing imminent death? I am sad because I couldn't go with him. I am glad that John was able to go and (hopefully) be able to spend time with her and tell her goodbye, but I am stuck here with kids that start school Monday. Plus we couldn't afford to fly or drive our whole family there. She is going to die and I am not even going to be able to talk to her or say goodbye. (She is too weak for the phone)
Thinking about that made me think more about my ex-husband's grandparents. I love them very, very much and they are getting old and failing in health. So, since they both live right by each other and 10 min. from the airport, I decided to stop by and spend some time with them. I want to see them as much as I can and let them have as much time with the kids as they can, while they are still here.
First I went by Anderson's house. I stayed there for a couple hours. They are the ones I am closest to. I love them so much like they were my own grandparents. I lived with them twice during my marriage to my ex husband and they have a special place in my heart. I really enjoyed talking with them and spending time with them.
While I was there I thought a lot about my ex's other grandparents. I hadn't seen or talked to them in 4 years. I was nervous about calling them, because (according to my ex) they didn't want to talk to me or anything. In fact, the last time he saw the girls (oct. 2005) he told me that gma Ensign had asked if she could call and talk to Hailey without having to talk to me. (um no, it is my house and I don't let 5 y.o. answer the phone). And that made me mad cause I had never been anything but nice to them. She had even said after our divorce that she hoped that I would continue our relationship cause my divorce was between my ex and I. So I had high hopes that things would be good. And then that. So I thought I would just drive by and see if I still remembered where they lived. I don't know. I just felt like I should. I did, and they happened to be sitting outside. I drove by, and almost kept going (if these people hate me, why do I want to talk to them?) and then I felt like I should go back. I turned around and parked across the street and went and talked to gma while she was watering. She seemed like she was glad to see me. We talked a few minutes. Then I mentioned that I had the kids in the car, and she was all excited and said to get them out. Then she called her daughter, who has a daughter 2 months younger than Hailey. So the girls also got to see their aunt and cousin. Surprisingly, the whole experience was really enjoyable and we sat there and talked and talked. The kids ran around and played with their cousin. When we had to leave, they asked me to call and visit with them again. Maybe take the kids to the park together. So I will definitely do that. Maybe this is the start of a really good relationship? I am really glad that I went over there and I hope that even though my ex is not a part of my daughters lives, that I will continue to be able to involve the rest of his family.
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